Domestic violence is one of those issues that is very uncomfortable to talk about, yet happens several times a day. There are so many women and men who suffer in deep silence with this problem. People are taking huge domestic hits from the violence that surrounds our society. These hits usually leave physical, psychological, and economic scars. These scars are normally caused by people who have some even deeper physical, mental, and economic scars. Walk with me as we take a look into this phenomenon that is constantly dividing families all across the country.
What is Domestic Violence?
First of all, women are not the only people who suffer from domestic violence. In fact, a survey conducted in 2010 determined that 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men were survivors of domestic violence. Domestic violence often has an impact on the household, and can also impact future generations. For example, let’s say an 8 year old boy witnesses his father violently attacking his mother on a weekly basis. What impact do you think that incident will have on that 8 year old boy? In most cases, he will grow up to be just like his father.
Verbal abuse can also be considered as domestic violence. That’s right. Physical altercations are not the only forms of domestic violence. Did you know you can also have domestic violence by denying someone resources and education? I just recently learned this through a study about different laws. According to the law, economic abusers often seek to maintain total control over financial resources, withhold the victims access to funds, or prohibit the victim from going to school or work.
All forms of domestic violence seek to put fear into the victims and to gain total control over their lives. I am a huge advocate for total freedom and making your own decisions. Let’s dive deeper into what we can do to influence the next generation to empower each other with education rather than dominate them through violent force.
This past weekend I had the privilege of hearing 3 young ladies tell their story about almost being victims of sex trafficking. If you’ve ever seen the movie Taken, you have some type of idea to what is going on in the world of trafficking young girls. I have heard plenty of stories but I never met anyone who actually experienced this terrifying ordeal.
At first I felt sick to my stomach knowing there are people out there who still seek to physically force other people into forms of slavery. Normally you see and hear about these situations in books or on television. When it’s right in your face, it can make you look at the world a little differently. The upside to the girl’s story was that they managed to survive the event and turned their pain into triumph. That is what was so inspiring to me. Still, I couldn’t help but to think of the people who aren’t fortunate enough to get away from the terror.
What Can We Do?
For the past 4 years I have been on a mission to better myself and become the father my son needs. It not only amazes me but also my family on how much I have grown over these years. The main thing I have learned in this time period is how much of an influence I am having on my son.
There’s is an old saying that goes “It’s easier to raise strong children than it is to fix broken men.” I’m aware that we are so far from living in a perfect world. I am also aware that everything you do in life is based on choices.
My choice is to do my very best to raise my son into a strong man. I am not with his mother so I don’t see him everyday. Even though this is true, I do my best to communicate with him through phone calls as often as I can. Even if I am just calling to tell him I was thinking about him, I do so because I want him to know that I am there for him no matter where I am. I think a lot of broken men are suffering from not fitting into a society that often pounded messages into their heads that told them they weren’t worth anything. I want my son to always know he has options before anyone tries to take them away from him.
You can also choose better mates which can lead to having healthier relationships. I cannot tell you how many people I know who insist on getting involve with toxic people hoping to “fix” them. I’ve got news for you, there are licensed psychotherapists who cant even help a lot of people. In my experience I think an adult has to fix himself in order to be stable and consistent for the rest of the world.
I talk a lot about self love because I know what it’s like to grow up thinking the whole world is against you. My belief is that if people truly know the value within themselves, they will focus a lot more on harmony rather than destruction. Raising strong kids is a byproduct of the type of people you choose to date. Even more so, you putting yourself in a position to attract the type of person you dream of will increase the chances of you having a healthy relationship.
Healthy relationships lead to raising strong children. I believe strong children grow up to be powerful adults. It’s like a domino effect. You choose a good partner to have kids with and your kids will grow up to do the same. If you are focused on bettering yourself, then your kids will see your efforts and follow in your footsteps. As you know, people often copy what they see. Don’t believe me? Ask some random person why they do a certain things. 9 times out of 10 they will tell you it’s because their mother, father, sister, brother, aunt or uncle did the same thing.
Maybe this won’t totally stop domestic violence but I do think we should start there. Building healthy relationships and raising strong children. Let’s help raise a more productive society. Each one teach one. Be blessed.